Ramblings of a Neurodiverse Insomniac

00:56

Having a hard time falling asleep.

Just moved across the country, and I'm not adjusting well to the new time zone.

That, and the fact the someone close to me had surgery a few days ago, and I'm responsible for making sure the pain meds, due every four hours, get dispensed in the middle of the night, on time.

Factor in my all too frequent insomnia and my ADHD...I'm having a tough time drifting off tonight.

I made the mistake of checking social media after the midnight medicine dose. Heard back from someone I just met at a drum circle. There's potential for a beautiful friendship, but I have to be careful.

Maybe it's bad enough that I responded to a message at 00:15, but then instead of shutting off my brain and falling asleep, I started thinking about all of the questions I want to ask this person. I stop myself from rapid firing these questions over social media in the middle of the night, but just barely. I don't want the genuine curiosity of a neurodiverse insomniac to come off as simple insanity. We're still in that first impression stage, and my intensity can be overwhelming at times (so I'm told).

Floating around in this exhausted stream of consciousness is the memory of the dream that came in my interrupted sleep last night. A dream of spiritual significance, that I'm still trying to sort. I hope I return to that dream, for a bit more clarity. At the same time, I'm terrified to do so.

Then I think about all the partially written blog posts, the unedited videos for the website...will that guy REALLY advocate for that really sweet gig for me? Why didn't that school call me back and hire me to teach? Where did I pack my contact lenses?

 01:11

The alarm is set for the next pain med dose. Maybe now that some of these ideas are out of my head, I can get some sleep before it goes off...

Conversations About Pie

Stories.

We all tell them. Some of them have more truth to them than others. Sometimes the most horrible stories are the ones we tell ourselves.

But there is no doubt that stories are an integral part of human civilization.

I learned long ago, for whatever reason, people tell me their stories. I’ve written before about stories, and if you like, you can also read Everyone Has a Story and The Stories We Tell and the Stories We Don’t.

Yesterday, I met a man who shared part of his story with me. It was a polite, casual conversation, but the significance of it was not lost on me. Stories are life. Stories are recollections of where we have been, and guidance for where we are going.

So, I met this man at the grocery store. He is an older gentleman, and he skillfully, and mindfully places my groceries into my reusable Chico bags. Then he surprises me when the transaction is complete. He takes the cart that he’s placed my bags in, and heads for the door.

He’s going to take my groceries to the car for me!

I should mention that I am currently in Florida, and this man works for a chain of grocery stores called Publix.

If you have not had the pleasure of shopping at Publix, I highly recommend it.

I said to the man, “I haven’t had someone take my groceries to the car since I lived in the Midwest!”

He replied that it was one thing that sets them (Publix) apart from other stores.

At that, I chuckled as I said, “Well, that and the best Key Lime Pie I’ve ever had!”

The conversation then progressed to how lemon meringue was his favorite and Publix’s version is not quite as good as a chain restaurant he frequents.

He then told me about his time as a cook in the Royal Navy, and how very fresh ingredients make all the different in cooking, as well as in pie,

This man shared part of himself with me, and spoke of how proud he was to have spent 16 years (so far) working for this company because of what they give back to people.

I got so much more than just groceries delivered to my car. I got a reminder of the goodness of humanity. I received, just a glimpse into the heart of a man who loves lemon meringue, and being of service to others with grace, respect, and kindness.

I think I would have enjoyed a much longer conversation with this man. I have a feeling he has an abundance of interesting stories. Yet I am truly grateful for the experience, and for the small reminder that goodness abounds in this world, simple pleasures, like a favorite pie, can brighten any day, and that when we are brave enough to share just a little bit of ourselves, authentically, we are often rewarded beyond measure.

And, I should have picked up one of those key lime pies while I was there…